12/01/2009

The Most Embarassing Hip Hop Songs of All Time (Benzino - Die Another Day)


Who remembers this? Benzino vs Eminem? Like putting Fat Joe against Lil Wayne in a Christmas Pie eating contest, this was over before it started... 

Now why is it one of the most embarrassing songs of all time? Here’s why: First of all, Benzino tried to go deep with this one by putting images of black slavery and lynchings etc. and apparently equating the severity of that situation with what Eminem had said in those shameful leaked tapes from way back. Benzino tried to start a revolution with this one, he was entirely convinced that he could get people to start saying, “Yeah man, F**K Em, Black power…” etc. Except for one thing. He was whack as hell.

Now, if Nas decided to take it personally and made a track, the following events may have played out very differently, but you can’t mobilise an army when the General is a washed up has-been. No matter what Benzino tried to say in this track whilst presenting himself as the speaker of every black person, he instead looked like a complete ass-hole who had a personal beef with Slim. And I can’t take the dude seriously when he gave himself like 5 Mics in the Source magazine and didn’t give Eminem his props.

Back to the track itself. The video is filmed in a cheap gym with Benzino lifting 5kgs and getting an erection over the fact he’s on camera again. ‘Subliminal historic black-struggle messages flashing on the screen’ aside, the video has been given tints of blue and red in some parts to make it look expensive...Nice! It obviously doesn’t work. The production was probably done in a few minutes, and the lyrics flow as well as a George Bush speech. The definition of garbage, a classic rags to riches to rags story.

Killer Line:

“You the rap David Duke, the rap Hitler, the culture stealer, ni**ers aint wit ya. I’m the Rap Huey, the rap Malcolm, the rap Martin, don’t worry, I’m a finish what we started.”

The rap Hitler? Did Eminem burn millions of Jews? Man how did I miss that moment of history?

You’re the rap Malcolm? Really Benzino?…were you fu**ing with the Nation of Islam and going out on the streets to fight for your people’s rights? Were you part of the Hip Hop Civil Rights Movement that we all seemed to miss?

He killed himself on that one...


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